I was doing research for a dating service branding project, but I took away two things I didn’t expect: first, that online dating sites (depending on which ones you join) are actual full of great people who are looking for an alternative to clubs and bars for meeting new people, and second that there are some oft-overlooked tricks to online dating that, according to many of the conversations I had, most people are not using. Make use of them, and you (and your date) should have a much more pleasant experience (and maybe you’ll find the girl or guy or transgendered person you’ve been looking for)! Do not, I repeat, DO NOT pretend to be something you are not while online dating.Not only will this lead to inevitable disappointment for your date, it will also end with inevitable embarrassment on your part when your date walks out on you, comments on how much weight you’ve gained or hair you’ve lost since you took the photo on the site, or asks you where the tattoo went (this is an actual story I was told..apparently a guy that the storyteller went on a date with had Photoshopped a tattoo onto his arm in order to strike up a conversation with the girl, who liked tattoos…she was not amused when she found out).Would you go out on a blind date with someone from the Internet, sight unseen? So even if you want to come back to them later and put in something REALLY good (see Tip 3), fill out all of the fields, upload some of your Facebook photos and stop whining, because otherwise you’re standing in the doorway and complaining that you don’t like the house.
I actually felt the same way about it until I undertook a research project a year and a half ago that led me to join 18 different dating sites, going on a date with a girl from each one.
If you can’t come up with anything interesting to say, trying breaking through your writer’s block by writing your message in a non-standard format. Good advice for life, but especially good for online dating.
When I’m stuck for the right words, for example, I’ll write in list-format (something I’m fond of doing in any writing situation, in fact). ’, point 2 would be a one-line introduction of yourself, including your name. The truth is, you’ll likely end up going on a lot of dates before you find someone who you’d want to take things to the next level with (if that is, indeed, what you are looking to do eventually).
Point 3 would be why you wanted to contact them, point 4 might bring up a common interest. I walked away from my dating experiences with a lot of new friends, and though I got lucky and found an awesome chick to date longer-term, I just as likely might not have, and I would have had to be happy with a double-handful of new friends.
Point 5 would be your parting words, something about hoping to hear back from them, and point 6 would be your ‘Goodbye! And I would have been, too, because I told myself ahead of time that whatever came of it I would at least have met some new people outside of my usual social group, gained some new (and sometimes quite bizarre) stories to tell, and tried something new (which should never be discounted).